How We’re Ensuring Mum Time for Our Eldest After Welcoming a New Baby
We all know that Anna is Jere’s, our eldest son’s, favourite.
Since Anna will be recovering from the delivery and most likely be preoccupied with our newborn once she gives birth, how will that new bond affect her relationship with Jere?
The most crucial step in preparing Jere for his new sibling’s arrival is ensuring he maintains his special connection with his mum.
We have to ensure Jere continues to feel loved and important, especially by Anna.
On that note, we’ll schedule dedicated “Mum and Jere” time to maintain harmony in our household.
Every Monday and Friday morning, Anna will take Jere out. They could do anything, such as go to the park, visit the cinema, or even have a fun activity at home.
This mother-and-son quality time will be carved out intentionally, even if it means planning ahead, such as ensuring there's pumped breast milk for the baby so that Anna can be fully present with Jere.
Why This Special Mother-Child Time Matters for Older Children After a New Baby is Born
Prevents Feelings of Neglect
Older children like Jere might feel neglected or less important when a new baby arrives, as newborns require a significant amount of attention and care.
Spending quality time with Jere will help mitigate these feelings, reassuring him that the arrival of his new sibling doesn’t diminish his significance in the family dynamic.
Anna’s activities with Jere will give him something to look forward to and allow him to realise that a newborn baby hasn’t replaced him.
Maintains Established Routines and Rituals
Keeping as many aspects of Jere’s routine unchanged provides a sense of normalcy and stability amidst the significant changes our new baby brings.
Quality time is part of maintaining these routines, which is comforting for older kids like Jere.
“Something like a constant where the kid knows, ‘Yes, this is something that I had before my sibling and I get to have it after my sibling’,” explained clinical psychologist Kristin Carothers, PhD.
Supports Emotional Well-Being
Older children like Jere can experience a range of emotions with the arrival of a new sibling, from excitement to resentment.
With Anna spending one-on-one time with Jere, we can address these feelings, offer support, and guide him through adjusting to his new role as an older sibling.
Strengthens Mum-Child Bond
The idea is to ensure Jere knows he still has special time with his mum, separate from the baby.
Quality time is essential for maintaining and strengthening the bond between parents and older children like Jere.
It’s our way of reassuring Jere of our love and commitment, strengthening the foundations of our relationship with him.
The Bottomline
As parents, we aim to create a harmonious and loving environment for both of our children, and it all starts with Jere feeling secure in his relationship with Anna, even as she takes on the demands of caring for a newborn.
Ultimately, we hope our efforts will prevent any feelings of jealousy or rivalry between Jere and our new kid.
Do you have ideas for Anna and Jere’s dates? How else can we reassure our son of his place in our family? Feel free to share your thoughts below!
Read here to find out what else we are doing to prepare our firstborn to be a big brother to our new baby.
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