Should You Always Forgive Your Spouse?
Sometimes, we set standards for our spouses that we can't even live up to.
The thing is, we can't expect perfection from our partners.
Having unrealistic expectations makes us feel entitled to be upset and feel resentment about things we shouldn't even be upset about.
The sooner we realised and made peace with the fact that our partner isn't God and holy but a flawed human being, the better things got in our married life.
Over the years, we've learned to cut each other some slack, forgive quickly, and move on when it comes to petty everyday arguments and misunderstandings.
We exemplify grace and express God's love when we forgive.
“The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will He harbour his anger forever; He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.”
We no longer dwell on minor grievances and allow resentments to linger because these things negatively affect our mental health, hinder meaningful communication, and rob us of precious time.
We put more importance on the little time we have for each other, especially now that most of our time already goes to our son, Jere, and soon, our new baby.
Before we let petty stuff lead to bigger arguments, we ask ourselves, "Is this issue worth the trouble?"
Sometimes, the resolution doesn't lie in an endless discussion about a disagreement but in intentionally reconnecting emotionally and moving forward together.
Swiftly forgiving present and past transgressions prevents us from harbouring negative feelings and holding grudges, preserving our friendship. It allows us to return to a place of trust after a conflict or misunderstanding.
Just keep in mind that while it's possible to forgive big mistakes, such as adultery and domestic abuse, these problems should never be swept under the rug. Seeking professional intervention or external help, such as that of a therapist or lawyer, is highly advisable in these cases.
The Bottomline
Choose your battles wisely. Not all small stuff is worth sweating.
It's important to forgive our spouses quickly, unless bigger problems are at hand, such as infidelity or physical violence.
If you're the offending person, learn to humble yourself and seek forgiveness.
What do you think forgiveness means in marriage? How do you facilitate forgiveness in your relationship?
Please don't hesitate to share your thoughts in the comment section below.
Discover what else we've learned in our eight years of marriage by reading here.
Make sure you never miss the latest updates from us, so subscribe to our newsletter and YouTube channel.
You can also follow us online!
