Mastering Budget Planning in Marriage: How to Be on a Budget

Tiny random purchases made because of impulse and poor communication, or a lack thereof, can pile up and lead to bigger problems in the future.

A Hargreaves Landsdown survey discovered that couples who co-create a household budget and plan how they utilise their monthly income do far better than those who assign only one partner to control their money.

So, we discuss pretty much all purchases above £50.

Intentionally making time for creating and revisiting our budget plan and other money-related conversations is crucial in ensuring financial harmony and stability in our marriage.

Emma-Lou Montgomery, Fidelity International Associate Director for Personal Investing, highlighted, "Often these conversations get pushed to the bottom of the list, but broaching money matters when you’re going to bed or dashing out the door is not conducive to financial harmony.”

Each month, we convene for a brief catch-up session to review forthcoming variable expenses beyond our regular living costs or fixed expenses.

This portion of our expenditures, which we call discretionary spending, encompasses items that aren't essential but are desires we'd like to fulfil.

Discretionary spending includes birthdays, Anna's hair appointments, clothes, etc.

We use our monthly meetings to allocate money wisely for these non-essentials.

Despite maintaining a realistic budget to avoid overspending, we remain flexible.

We round up our expenses to the nearest £10 and round down our take-home income to the nearest £100. We also incorporate a 10% to 15% buffer into our expenses.

Catering to Anna's aversion to stringent restrictions, these methods afford us a margin for unexpected expenses.

Our flexibility allows Anna to enjoy spontaneous lunches and dinners, and host gatherings and other social activities without feeling constrained.

Gabes, whose top priority is to save money for the future, prefers a well-organised plan because it's important for him to keep track of the ins and outs. But he ensures it's not overly rigid to suit Anna's dislike for strictness and accommodate her spontaneity.

In shaping our budget, we take into consideration our respective personalities and money language profiles.

Managing money as a couple isn't easy, so we try to complement each other to make the process as smooth and free from conflict as possible.

“Don’t panic if you find you have completely different attitudes to money than the person you’re with. It can actually be beneficial and bring some financial balance to your relationship," explained Montgomery.

Our budgeting process strives to serve both preferences, enabling us to plan sensibly for the future while embracing the spontaneity of the present.

If we manage our money separately, Gabes might exercise excessive caution, and Anna might find herself spending more money than necessary. Together, we are able to enjoy the moments and work on our financial goals simultaneously.

Additionally, because our budget incorporates our personality and values, we feel a sense of belonging rather than being dominated by each other.

The Bottomline

Our unified money management style revolves largely around regular budget meetings and open communication.

By discussing purchases above a certain threshold, and wisely allocating funds from our after-tax income for our needs and wants, we ensure financial harmony and flexibility.

Recognising and accommodating each other's attitudes towards money allows us to strike a balance between meeting our savings goals and savouring the present.

Through this process, we not only manage our finances effectively but also strengthen our relationship by embracing our differences and shared goals.

Do you discuss all your expenses with your partner? What spending limits do you impose in your marriage? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below!

Read more about other ways we manage our finances as a married couple here.

Curious how we plan our joint and personal budget? Get a FREE copy of our budgeting template here!

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